As many of you may recall, that gap year was a difficult one for Aaron. As one of the Rotarians so well expressed, "Aaron internalized it." For those of you, like Mom and Dad, who were looking forward to all his wonderful, exciting stories upon his return to the states...well, you were likely disappointed as Aaron was just not interested in rehashing all he had done and experienced.
In the last blog post written just over three years ago, I stated that I hoped the impact of the trip would gradually reveal itself to Aaron. We saw it in bits and pieces. A year or more after settling in back home, he finally started to piece together a scrapbook of mementos and favorite pictures. He'd still keep in contact with his new international friends. He'd plan his own New York City trip where he'd set off on his own to see the sites of the Big Apple during the Christmas holiday season. He'd run off within an hour to go be a roadie for a weekend for a Southern Rock band. He'd comment that he'd realize he had learned a lot while in Europe.
Then last night it went one step further. He and I had just spent the night watching a concert by a band we both enjoy. Admittedly, for this middle aged mom, the lyrics of this band, Here Come the Mummies, are a bit quirky and risqué, but their funk and energy are infectious. Anyway, as we travel home, Aaron reassures me that the CD I bought is a good one and proceeds to play a few of the songs on his car. Then he skips selections to one called "Beautiful," and says, "I really like this one. It reminds me of my trip to Slovakia."
I listen. It is clearly a love song.
"Is this about a girl in Europe?" I ask. "No, just the whole trip," he explains. I listen to some of the lyrics, and we talk on top of some of the words as he asks me if I'm surprised. He wants to know if I was surprised that he has already travelled back to Slovakia. I explain that I was not totally surprised. I tell him I have always had hope but could not know for sure if he would travel back or value that trip.
I continue to listen to the song and am hit emotionally as I hear the word "beautiful" being repeated.
Clearly, Aaron has reached a point where the whole experience of Europe can be seen as beautiful. Not just the ski trips. Not just the hockey. Not just the concerts. Not just weekend excursions. Not just longer explorations to Barcelona, Spain and such. But all of it. Even the tough parts. The dark parts. The long parts.
Tears start to ascend within my system, but do not fall. "Wow" I quietly state.
"What?" Aaron wants to know.
"I am speechless."
Today I returned to the song and listened to it carefully. Within the simple love song are key phrases that make it understandable it is meaningful for Aaron. But for this mother, tears of thankfulness did make their way to the surface and fall today as I heard these words from the song:
"This is how the story goes
With your suitcase by the door
So I'll treasure all the time we had
And I would never trade it back
I need to let you know
This was beautiful
Ooooh ooh, beautiful"
With your suitcase by the door
So I'll treasure all the time we had
And I would never trade it back
I need to let you know
This was beautiful
Ooooh ooh, beautiful"
Still a bit speechless in trying to explain my feelings and thoughts on all this. Just so thankful he "would never trade it back." So thankful. Yes, beautiful. Indeed.
For your listening pleasure, the whole song:
