Picking Up the Slack

We'll know we forgot to feed them supper
when they come to stare us down.
(Harley on the left and Joy on the right.)

There have been no great emotional breakdowns. Yet ever so gradually this mom is missing her son. If not before, it began the first time I had to feed the cats their evening meal. Tonight it was when I vacuumed the floor and took the recyclables to the curb. It was Aaron's  responsibility to feed Joy and Harley their supper. Often I could count on him to assist with the sweeping of the carpet and handling of the trash or recyclables if only I asked.

These are just but a few of the ways I am sure to notice his absence. It's definitely bittersweet. Bitter to realize he is not here to help. Sweet to realize he was willing to help when he was here...even if it did take a few reminders once in a while.

So here in the USA, we have our saying of "picking up the slack". Having had a fisherman for a father, I imagine this saying came from the idea of picking up the slack, or "extra length," in your fishing line so as to make the chances of catching a fish greater. It looks like we'll be picking up the slack here as we do the extra things we were able to delegate to Aaron. We'll definitely have to adjust to a redistribution of chores and style of living as we welcome the beginning of our empty nest.

Wake Up Call

I probably just had the most interesting of all wake up calls. Literally and figuratively. Mike called me, and I was still in bed. "What are you doing?" he inquired.

"Laying here listening to my snooze alarm. Why?" I responded.

"Well, how much do you want me to tell you when Aaron calls me?" he asked.

Now if that isn't a loaded question, I am not sure what is. We established, at least for today, to go ahead and tell me what's going on.

"This morning at 6 a.m. Aaron called and wanted to know if he could go flying with a friend of the family who is an acrobatic pilot," he confided.

I recall a few seconds of silence then laughter on my end. "Well, you know that's what he there for...to have an adventure." 

"Yep," said Mike. "I told him to go for it."

From all reports Aaron survived and enjoyed the trip in the little two seat airplane.

Now as I prepare the rest of my day, I am thinking perhaps it wasn't by chance that after we dropped Aaron off at the airport Saturday we headed to Two EE's Winery. We tasted the wine. Mike broke a glass before he even started to imbibe, Then we purchased two bottles. While we really are coping well for the time being, those bottles of fermented grapes just might come in handy as we continue to "wake up" to the realization our young man is on the adventure of a lifetime.

Our two bottles of wine.
They might turn into morning "coffee" if these kind of wake up calls continue!

"Things Will Never Be the Same"

Aaron lifted off today. Everything went smoothly on this end.

• Aaron got to bed at the reasonable hour of about midnight.
• We all got up about 6 a.m.
• Together we made it down to our little town cafe for breakfast.
• Checked in and had a friendly airport employee who checked in Aaron's bags with no problems.
• Sat in the coffee shop together and waited as one of his Rotary representatives, Greg Solon, joined us.
• Kissed him good-bye with minimal tears. 
• Watched him go through security as the first TSA agent told him he thought he needed more "bling."
• Waved good-bye.
• Moved the car to the end of the run way to wait to watch him take off.
• Visited with another Rotary member, Dick Conklin, who was just five minutes late to see Aaron.
• Waved to his airplane as it taxied to start its lift-off.
• Watched it lift off.

Then we all started our new journey. As we pulled out of the airport, Mike said, "You know, just like 18 years ago, things will never be the same." 

"Yeah, I know," I replied. We both recalled the last time he told me those words. It was on our route to the hospital on the day Aaron was born. 

Aaron lifted off today...in oh so many ways. 

One last kiss.

First security check point

Second security check point.
Looking comfortable for the flight.

Checked In and Chilling

It's 7:38 a.m. And we've got his bagged checked in with one pound to spare. 

Now just relaxing outside the gate near the coffee shop.

Holding Back The Camera

I once shared a lesson with my son about how sometimes in life it's just important to put our cameras down and soak in the moment. Make the memory in your mind and not saved on some computer drive. There's a long story involved with this lesson I learned that dates back to the late 1980's and Tom Selleck. Aaron has his own story about this life lesson that involves Pete Rose at Cooperstown three years ago.

As I prepared to make another blog entry tonight, I went to check my phone for any pics to download and realized I haven't taken any in the last few days. There were opportunities--good ones too. At last night's campfire there were family members saying their good-byes. Today we went out and visited a dear friend of Aaron's who hasn't been able to make it to church the last few weeks because of a hip fracture. The thought of grabbing a quick picture during both these special times did cross my mind. But I let the thought go.

Just soaking it in. More importantly, letting Aaron soak it in without having to stop and smile for a camera...especially while he's struggling to hold the tears back.

Head Spinning

Today was a full day of trying to problem solve the issue of wanting to send a guitar with Aaron on the trip. We had some successes, yet are still experiencing hurdles.

Balancing work, trip preparation, saying good-byes, and trying to keep some semblance of healthy balance in life is a struggle.

Aaron's self professed goal is just to keep moving things along so he can get over there. He even expressed frustration when Mike and I agreed we needed just a half hour break tonight after we wrapped up our campfire bon voyage. "We don't have time for breaks," he grunted as he put his head down on the counter. Parents rule. Break obversed.

I have faith it will all work out. In the meantime, it certainly is an adventure.

Heading to bed a little earlier than usual tonight to get up and go at it all again tomorrow.

Song for the Day

Time's Quickly Ticking

The days are quickly running together.

Mike and Aaron returned from Springfield, Ohio where they enjoyed being around other Scout truck owners.

The cat missed Aaron being away for two day.
Don't know what she'll do for 10 months. 

Aaron came home and found his driver's license.

Sunday we all attended church one last time. The priest called Aaron forward to give him a small Franciscan Cross for his travels as he reminded him he is an ambassador of not only his country but the church as well. He said a prayer and blessed him. Then he hugged Aaron. Finally tears began to fall. Just for the record, let it be known that Mike and Aaron were the first two to shed the most tears. It was only when I got a good look at them crying after Mass that I started to cry.

Aaron began to pack his suitcase.

I called the airlines only to discover he will NOT be able to carry on his guitar for the overseas portion of his trip. Now we are in a scramble coming up with alternative plans.

We ate our neighborhood diner, Rich's Cafe, for lunch for the last time. Either Aaron and Mike have been eating there on Saturday mornings since Aaron was born, or we've all stopped there together after Mass on Sundays. The owner was more than willing to give Aaron one of their uniform shirts...straight from New Haven, Indiana.

We've also been trying to straighten up the house and get the grass cut before some friends, family and neighbors arrive tomorrow night for a farewell campfire. Nothing fancy...just hot dogs, marshmallows, and water. Mostly a time just for hugs and good wishes.

Time keeps on ticking and slipping, and in between we grab a few winks.

Just four more days.

Sub-conscious Fears Manifest???

During the last few days, Aaron has confided he is getting nervous. I suppose that is normal. From a parent's perspective his level of nervousness seems appropriate. Then yesterday, after he had traveled south a few hours in his restored International Scout, he informs his father by phone that he has lost his driver's license. First, my husband establishes that it has not been confiscated by the authorities for any reason. Nope. Just lost. Aaron says he's looked everywhere four times and had an announcement made at the car festival he is attending. Nothing.

Now I don't know a lot about psychology. While it was my minor in college, that was 25 years ago. Yet I can't help but wonder if this isn't some silly trick of his sub-conscious putting a hurdle in his way this week before he is scheduled to lift off on August 22. Oh, I know I'm over-analyzing, but it's fun sometimes. I just hope this hurdle isn't insurmountable, and I'm also VERY grateful it wasn't his passport he lost.

Aaron with his restored Scout that he took to the IH Scout and Light Truck Nationals in Springfield, Ohio. 

Addendum: On the following day, while pre-packing, Aaron found his drivers license. He had placed it with some official papers after meeting with a banker on Thursday.

Good-Byes Begin

BonVoyage cakes don't usually accompany our monthly coffee and donuts at church. However, since last Sunday was Aaron's concluding monthly social, Mike and I offered to make sure that Aaron's church family knew this would be a good time for them to say their "Good-byes." So as we went about organizing it, one of the church ladies offered to bring in a cake. Before services, we invited everyone to be sure and stay afterwards to wish him well.

Aaron has been a member at St. Mary's Catholic Church since he was 2 years old. He's been a server/acolyte, choir member, parish council youth representative, a soup kitchen volunteer, and soup kitchen fundraiser committee member. Yep, he gets around! 

While Aaron has a number of small groups he considers family, the community at St. Mary's is definitely one of the largest and most special groups. They have watched him grow and are excited about his adventure. So many of them donated to his trip that it is difficult to image it coming to fruition without their help. 

We had a good time with our friends and family! We thanked them while they wished Aaron safe and blessed travels.

First Win, First Penalty!

Tonight was another good night for the Rorick family. We headed out to our indoor ice rink where Aaron is finishing up his first season back on the ice after a 4 year hiatus. He's involved in the Adult Safe Hockey League and took up the position as goalie just 3 months ago. This evening he recorded his first win as he played the whole game in the net. He also had his first penalty in this position. He seemed equally proud of both.

I am sure he will experience many other "firsts" in the Slovak Republic, but happy that both of us parents could enjoy this one!

Aaron in goal!
(Yes with a camera mounted to his helmet.)

Working the Circuit

This Monday began with my son and me gathering with our sponsoring Rotary Club of Fort Wayne. The guest speaker was from Fort Wayne Community Schools and spoke about the their programs to help students learn English. Interestingly, there are 70 languages spoken by the children in our city schools. I once heard that in one middle school alone there were 27 languages! Coming from the educational field, she wanted us to get a glimpse of what extra effort many of these children have put forth in their everyday classes. She challenged us to pair up and then spend just a few quick moments trying to tell the other person what we had done that morning without using any words with a "s" or an "n." We all fumbled and bumbled and looked a lot less intelligent than we really are. Just adding that one extra process really slowed us down. I sat there thinking about Aaron next to me and the daily, almost constant, struggle he will encounter upon his arrival in the Slovak Republic. In 18 days, they say he will begin to encounter a headache that may last from 2-4 weeks. It will be caused by the constant processing his brain is performing in attempting to make sense of the language. I'm glad his host mother is a medical doctor and will know how to help with the headaches!

Club banners to be given as gifts.

Before leaving, we collected four small banners from the club to be gifted to Aaron's host club and host families. We also verified the time of the arriving Germany student. His plane was due at the airport about 6:45 p.m..

In the afternoon, Aaron set out on his own to seek a few in-kind donations. First, he visited Sweetwater Music Instruments and Pro Sound. Actually, it was there that he started out by seeing if the V.P. of Human Resources had a couple minutes so he could ask him about becoming a luthier, one who makes stringed musical instruments like guitars. Aaron explained that he had applied and been accepted to a trade school for this purpose and wanted to know what the guy thought of the Galloup School of Guitar Building and Repair. At which point the fellow pulled out a business card and explained he had just written the school on the back of the card as a recommendation for Aaron. Some of their most prepared employees have graduated from the school. Aaron was pretty excited when he learned this. He feels better about investing the money in the education at the trade school. As they wrapped up that discussion, Aaron shifted to asking him if he knew who he could talk to about possibly getting help with obtaining a very sturdy guitar case he had spotted at their annual Gear Fest. He hopes it will protect the guitar he plans to take to Europe. The man referred him to someone else and told him to write a short cover letter to the solicitation letter he already has that would specifically state what he was looking for. He thought they might be able to help in some way.

Welcoming inbound German student, Richi, at the Fort Wayne airport.

Then Aaron dropped off another letter to our minor league hockey club, the Fort Wayne Komets. His goal is that they might donate a jersey for his first host family whom he knows enjoys the sport. By this time, he was pretty tired having trucked around in his vehicle with no air-conditioning and loud muffler.

So I graciously picked him up, and we headed to the airport. There we met a small group of Rotarians along with the first host family of the incoming student. We greated him and his weary body, took a few pictures, collaborated with some of the stragglers in the group and then left.

Bottom view of a 12-position rotary switch
showing wiper and contacts.
(Photo Credit: Wikipedia/Rotary switch)

Quickly following the jaunt out to the airport, we returned to the New Haven area and caught up with the New Haven Lions Club. Members of the club had partnered with Aaron in May by having a chicken dinner fundraiser. We wanted to thank them again and provide them with an update on how his experience is going.

Creating and keeping connections on the circuit board of life is just part of the Rotary Youth Exchange experience!

A Series of Final Days

Aaron on the day of his
"temporary retirement" from the working world

The end times are coming...and I'm not talking about the world. A series of events have resulted in making it clear that this is a season for "lasts." It's been about two weeks ago when Aaron celebrated his last day of work. Doesn't sound like anything too impressive until one considers he worked as a server at St. Anne Home and Retirement for over two years. That's quite a bit of seniority for an 18 year old!

Then we took our last family vacation before he leaves. We spent over 3 days in the Cooperstown, New York area enjoying the National Baseball Hall of Fame induction weekend. We also just relaxed and took in the serene scenery. Unexpectedly, Niagara Falls even made it onto our itinerary on the return trip as Mike had never seen them!

Aaron, Mike, and Charlene
at Niagara Falls, New York

And it's the small things too. Last Friday and Saturday we held what was likely our last garage sale after ten years. It had become a tradition. Aaron had learned business principals (like paying his dad back for the concession supplies) and negotiating skills. On Sunday we stood in church prior to communion and exchanged the sign of peace. I looked at Aaron, hugged him as usual, then noted that I only have a couple more of these before he leaves.

I imagine if I were the parent of a son preparing to leave for college, I might note these events or perhaps not. I recall my own time of young adulthood as transitional. This route with Aaron seems much more fixed. It does not feel like my son is taking baby steps into adulthood but rather a giant leap.

As they teach the youth in the exchange program, do not look at your home or host country as being right or wrong, just different. This is true of this experience for me as well. It is very different to experience these final days. While other parents will be able to continue to see their college students as they commute from home or visit on occasional weekends (to do laundry of course!), my son will be half way around the world for over 10 months.

People, very frequently, will ask if we're going to miss him. To which we often respond that we are ready for him to leave...we are ready to experience a home to ourselves...at least for a while. But, yes we will miss him. Perhaps that is why I continue to savor these moments and this time.

Resting at Glimmerglass State Park, 
located at the north end of Lake Otsego, New York.